The report of its death was an exaggeration

I missed this, but a friend of mine heard this from WTMJ radio’s Jeff Wagner Tuesday:

Shortly before noon today, I received an email from Summerfest announcing that 1980s hair metal band Motley Crue would be performing at Summerfest on July 4th. It’s being billed as their Farewell Tour.

At the time, my friend and colleague Michelle Richards was in the studio preparing to read the noon news. When she learned that Motley Crue was coming, her first response was: “Are they still alive?”

Yes Michelle, they aren’t dead yet – although in some cases not from lack of trying.

Since the announcement was embargoed until 3 p.m., I couldn’t share the news that this particular band was on the way. I did however share Michelle’s comment – which led to a flood of emails from listeners speculating on what band could be coming that could be described as “Are they still alive”?

Some suggestions made me nostalgic (“Crosby, Stills and Nash”) and some just made me feel old. On the other hand, a couple of bands that were suggested really aren’t still alive.

Anyway, if you can’t get enough of “Smoking in the Boy’s Room”, or you just want to see the former Mr. Pamela Anderson in person, you know where to be on July 4th.

First: Wagner sort of misspelled the band’s name — the correct spelling is “Mötley Crüe” with the diaeresis, or umlaut, over the O and U, similar to Blue Öyster Cult. As for that part about a “Farewell Tour,” some bands have had more than one farewell tour, which brings to mind the Dan Hicks song, “How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away.”

This makes one think of the other umlaut-user, Blue Öyster Cult, as well. David Crosby isn’t dead, though he’s on his second liver. Nor is Neil Young, though whether he’s part of CSN (which I assume would be CSNY) apparently depends on the day.

Crüe bassist Nikki Sixx did indeed have a near-death experience:

In a post on his Facebook.com page on Sunday (23Dec12), he writes, “25 years ago today I had two almost-fatal drug overdoses that changed my life forever. I can’t even see myself these days as that kid who was running head strong into the abyss, but I know he taught me how to live when he finally decided to do it for himself. I would of (sic) never seen the birth of my four beautiful children and had such a wonderful life (even with its adversity) if I had not kicked drugs.

“I can’t say it loud enough, if your (sic) into them or considering doing them: drugs don’t work. The downside is never pretty.

“I am extremely grateful to be able to look back over these last 25 years and have all the memories that would of (sic) otherwise gone down up flames… Life really is a crazy and fun journey, isn’t it? Have a great holiday season wherever you are. Live in the moment.”

Sixx (born Frank Carlton Serafino Feranna Jr.) can now be heard on classic rock radio stations, as can Alice Cooper (born Vincent Damon Furnier) , who will be joining the Crüe on Independence Day and knows something about near-death experiences too.

Readers of my Presty the DJ posts know that many rock acts ascended to Rock and Roll Heaven earlier than they should have, beginning with an event whose anniversary is next week: